That was a spot of trouble last week, eh... Though I was otherwise occupied for the last bit, very busy things, so if you'd care to inform me about what happened, I wouldn't be against it.

If you're not inclined to talk, that's quite all right. I've made a new recipe for scones, see, and they're much better now, so I do invite anyone to come and ( Read more... )

[ England had been remarkably capable of handling himself quite well for the past week or so. Certainly he sulked by hiding under his blankets, but he did that with pride. Or at least a respectable-looking blanket. But on the 21st day at the fourteenth hour at thirty-three seconds, as he realised he had written nothing but the word SOCKS1 for the ( Read more... )

I-it's not like I want to celebrate Mother's Day or anything like that, or... or, well, I'm not a bloody mother. But I suppose if you insist upon considering it and giving me a present or appreciating me, I wouldn't refuse.

Also, nobody is allowed to shag America.

[A raspy voice.] Everybody's all right, aren't they? That bloody Westport--I still have no bloody clue why we were there, or... [Coughing.] Just tell me what you know about Westport. It's all so stupid. It's all so incredibly stupid.

... At least everybody is all right now. They have to be.

( A copy of the following is pinned on England's doorway. )

Listen, I'm just calling to say that... Well, I don't suppose anybody was worried, but still. I'm quite fine, and there's no need to worry. I'm a responsible adult, and I know how to take care of myself. Honestly, there's... [The sound of distracted ripping of the mail.]

....... AHAHAHAhahaahahahahahaha fuuuuck this bollocks because... because ( Read more... )

Everybody's busy having fun, are they? Well, that's quite... quite good. I mean, it's not as if I was dreading this stupid little holiday because they always tell me that they're my friends and they stupidly turn around and tell me April Fool b-but it's not like I wanted to be their friend in the first place so it's not like I mind or anything.... ( Read more... )

Val... Valentine's Day really wasn't quite so bad, but it's not like I'm happy or anything like that. But it's no time to just sit back and relax. Must be more vigilant and... well, I suppose I could do a bit more. Perhaps a business prospective would be in order ( Read more... )

Ahahahaha-- It's... It's not like I'm happy or anything that I'm not spending Valentine's Day with someone else for once or anything like that. I mean, I'm just... it's a good day, that's all. Doesn't matter if you spend it alone or not. Or if you've spent it alone for plenty of bloody years before--Well, I mean... I... I might have some candy for ( Read more... )

So it seems that everybody has returned. More or less, I mean. It's over, isn't it? I mean... Is everybody all right?

... But now that it's over, it'll be nice to get some decent sleep. Been tired lately, all that--but I'm sure tomorrow is a better day.

[ The phone is lifted with a soft click. ]

Pardon the bother, but I was wondering if anyone has--what?

Oh, no, please, I couldn't possibly--well, all right. But really, I don't need any apples. I-It's not like I'm lonely or anything. I mean, even if was, not anymore, and... oh, don't lift that, it's much too heavy for you. And salt's too ( Read more... )