Forever & Ever 16
Title: Forever & Ever (Miseinen Sequel)
Author: Zion Shadowlet
Beta: butterflysaga(the bitch)
Characters: Aoi, Uruha, Ruki, Reita, Kai and many OCs (Fuwa etc.)
Pairing: Aoi/Uruha and more~
Genre: Drama, Romance, Friendship, Comedy
Rating: NC17
Summary: Six years have passed since the summer at the Dazai Bright Future Retreat for Troubled Children. The boys meet in an unexpected way perhaps bound by fate in the underground world of Visual Kei. With broken hearts and promises; the boys-now young men look to regain some of what they lost by the wild and reckless pursuit of the same dream.
Previous Parts: Part 1.1 | Part 1.2 | Part 2 | Part 3 | Part 4.1| Part 4.2| Part 5| Part 6| Part 7.1| Part 7.2| Part 8.1| Part 8.2| Part 9| Part 10| Part 11| Part 12| Part 13| Part 14| Part 15
Without fail, Lie:Death had their usual meeting. Each member of course was there on time, never more than 5 minutes past the 8 AM starting time. For a group of very young men, they were surprisingly professional and serious. The main song writers: the singer and the lead guitarist would present any new compositions and then they would go through them, meticulously critiquing every subtle aspect. Once that was finished, they would work on other material until they exhausted their capacity to improve it. Since many of the members held jobs, they scheduled practice late at night 4 days during the week. The other three days they would be performing at local venues.
They were like a well-oiled machine. And since each member was good at their job and knew what their job was, it seemed to all who had seen them and knew about them, that they were destined for great things. They weren’t like these other bands that goofed around, talking about nothing of any import, only to squeeze in a couple hours of actual work as they were all about to head out the door, wasting the good portion of the rehearsal time on chatter and immature jokes. No, Lie:Death was certainly not one of those bands at all. They were promising.
Kai always found these meetings tiring. They seemed to drain his energy faster than lives. Without the fans there, he felt as if every second of his concentration had to be forced out from his sheer willpower. Deep down, he wondered if he was the weakest member of the band. The others all seemed content with how things were. It was almost as if they didn’t find the meetings boring or taxing, almost as if they lived their lives like this, every moment in serious discussion on music. He perhaps would have cracked a joke or talked more about himself if he didn’t wonder that he was subpar compared to the others. Often times, he couldn’t quite understand what they were saying or talking about. He wasn’t as well educated in music as they were, especially Yukio, their lead guitarist. He was a musical genius-at least, that’s how the others saw him. He carried about him an air of greatness. In his presence, Kai for the most part was silent. It was enough for him to know that Yukio thought him a good enough drummer to be in Lie:Death.
As usual, as 10 AM inched closer and closer, Kai would watch the clock, waiting for the scheduled 20 minute break. As soon as the minute hand struck the 12, he jumped to his feet.
“Oh, looks like it’s 10,” Yukio said without any trace of emotion. The group dispersed in various ways, some going to the bathroom, others to the kitchen to get something to eat. Kai, however starved for social interaction went outside and decided to call someone. Scanning his lists of contacts, he decided that he might as well call Ruki. Pressing the talk button on Fuwa’s house number, he put the cell phone to his ear and listened to the ring.
“Hello?” Mr. Fuwa said on the other side.
“Hey! Fuwa! It’s me Kai.”
“Hey,” he laughed happily. In background, he could tell that he was in the kitchen and he could hear the sound of someone playing the piano stiffly. “How are you?”
“I’m good. How are you?”
“I’m good. How are your mother and sister?”
“Great actually!” He didn’t realize how nice it would be to speak to Fuwa again. Hearing his voice, he felt as if he could say anything. Even over the phone, he had this comforting and paternal presence. “My mom is healthy and my sister is going to college to be a nurse.”
“That’s wonderful. I’m really happy to hear that.”
“Yeah, she had a hard time at first but like my mom, she’s stronger than she looks.”
“It must run in the family,” Fuwa said sweetly.
“I heard about Kuramoto.”
“Yes. It’s…” he sighed. “It’s hard even now. I mean, I know he was old but I knew him for a very long time. Some days, I think that he is still alive,” Fuwa went quiet. In his mind, he wasn’t really thinking about his good friend Kuramoto even though he still greatly missed him. Rather, he had a sense of foreboding in him that wouldn’t let him not think about Isao. He had the feeling that he would be saying the same thing about his husband. In that moment, as he sensed what was to be, the future was bleak and empty.
“I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have brought it up,” the young man said apologetically on the other side.
“It’s alright, Kai. It is better to talk about these things,” he replied, his voice kind and understanding. Gathering his strength, he asked, changing the subject “You’re in a band now?”
“Yes. I play drums.”
“That’s great.” Kai could hear him messing with something on the stove.
“You’re cooking?”
“Late breakfast. Isao doesn’t eat in the morning and I usually just have coffee and toast but now that Ruki’s here, he is always complaining about how no one cooks,” he laughed. “So, I’m making him and myself breakfast.”
“Is that him playing the piano?” A feeling of contentment came over Kai as he thought about Ruki sitting there around the kitchen table drinking orange juice and eating breakfast, Fuwa sitting there across from him, asking him about his day. He wondered if his friend ever had relaxing moments like that in his life.
“Yes! That’s him. Actually, he had no idea what he was doing when he sat down but it sounds like he is beginning to figure the thing out. Would you like to talk to him? I’m assuming that’s why you called,” the older man said amiably.
“Yeah, I would like to.”
“Ruki! Phone!” he called out.
“Who is it?” Ruki asked, somewhat irritated.
“Kai.”
The piano went quiet in the background as Ruki made his way to the kitchen to get the phone. “How much longer?” Kai could hear him ask Fuwa.
“5 minutes? Something like that.”
Grabbing the phone, Ruki said “Hey. What’s up?” He could hear him take a seat at the table.
“Just calling on my break.”
“Are you at the restaurant?”
“It’s a band meeting,” he answered wearily.
“What’s wrong? You sound tired. Was there a fight?”
“No, they aren’t the most social people,” Kai laughed.
“Oh, so they are boring?” Ruki hungry, started picking out little things of fruit from a bowl that Fuwa had placed on the table. He purposely picked out all the mulberries first.
“Just a bit. But I can’t complain. We get a lot of work done.”
“I see.” Ruki couldn’t help but think that if it wasn’t fun, then why the hell were they doing it? But as soon as that thought crossed his mind, he felt ashamed of himself. He ought to be admiring their work ethic even though it seemed void of any enjoyment. His last band’s meetings were boring and tiresome too he remembered. As he started on the blueberries, he promised himself that he was never going to work with a musician who he found irritating or dull.
“How’s the drummer search coming along?” Kai asked.
“Aoi found this guy that’s interested. We’re supposed to check him out I think. At least, that’s what I’ve been told. I don’t know when though. He hasn’t given me the details. Fuwa,” Ruki suddenly said. “I hate strawberries. Don’t buy them anymore.” Kai could hear him throwing their thick heavy bodies onto the surface of the table, Ruki’s distaste for them evident in the increasing and repetitive thuds.
“Isao likes them. Hey-hey-hey,” Fuwa said turning around. “Stop that.”
Kai could hear another thud. Ruki was deliberately disobeying him. He imagined him looking up at him defiantly as he suppressed an evil smile.
“If I was meaner, I’d make you eat them and I mean the ones you threw on the floor,” Fuwa laughed.
“Hey, keep it up and I’ll throw them at you,” Ruki teased. “Sorry,” he said to Kai. “Fuwa is trying to get smart with me.”
“I see,” Kai smiled.
“What are your plans for today?”
“I have to work once I get out of here at 4. I think I’m just going to go ahead and ask Haru out.”
“Seriously?!” Ruki became immediately more interested.
“Yeah. I don’t know what I am waiting for. I’m just going to lie it all down on the line.”
“You’re crazy.”
“How does that make me crazy?”
“If it was me, I’d just be quiet and pray that she starts liking me back,” Ruki laughed.
“I’m assuming that you don’t date often.”
“No, not really. Girls scare the shit out of me.”
“You aren’t helping, Ruki.”
“They are really scary. I know for a fact. I had a lot of friends that were girls and when they are mad…man, they are really really frightening. You have no idea the kinds of things girls have told me.”
“I really don’t want to know,” Kai said honestly.
“No, I mean it. They are vicious. One time-”
“Ruki, please. No.”
“You’re not interested?” Ruki was legitimately surprised. Since he befriended mostly girls, this sort of topic was general considered fascinating.
“No, I’m not. If you keep talking about it, I might chicken out.”
“Be prepared for the worst,” he said as if they were in a horror movie of sorts.
“Um…I’ll try.”
“If you go about it the wrong way…”
“I know. I know. I should be scared.” Why was Ruki so into this conversation? “Anyhow, I have to go back to the meeting before they think something is up.”
“Alrighty,” Ruki said cutely, his demeanor suddenly different. “Good luck!”
“Thanks.”
***
Uruha had given him the address to a restaurant, a cozy family run curry place with low lights and soft cushiony chairs. The waitress even was an older lady with a charming, warm smile. When he came in, she went up to him and asked him sweetly if he was alone. He said he was supposed to meet a friend there.
“Oh, how lovely!” she rested her hands on her apron and tilting her head, smiled at him once more, somewhat in the same fashion Kai would often smile. She made him feel immediately welcomed. “How about this table? It is right near the window.”
“This is perfect. Thank you,” he returned her sweet smile and sat down on the soft, red chair and looked around. There were pictures on the burnt orange walls of the restaurant from years past. In one photo that was taken in the 1970s, it looked like the waitress when she was younger. She had the same glowing gentleness.
This place wasn’t exactly what Aoi had expected. But then again, this was a date with Uruha.
“It is lovely outside, isn’t it?” The waitress said picking up an upturned glass from the table and pouring him some water. “Chilly but one can smell the coming of warm weather.”
“It’s nice,” he agreed politely.
“Can I get you anything else?”
“No, this is perfect.”
Uncharacteristically early, Uruha walked in the door. It was 4:45. Aoi was expecting him in from anywhere between a half hour to a full hour. He was usually late with all things, taking his sweet time to get ready or to leave.
“Kouyou!” the waitress said with yet again another sweet smile.
“Mrs. Nakata,” he bowed.
“Where is your sister?”
“Oh, I um…eating with a friend tonight.” Seeing Aoi sitting there, looking back over his shoulder at him, Uruha gestured toward him.
“Oh! How lovely. Well, please sit down,” she said as she went to go get the menus.
“You’re early,” Aoi said as Uruha took his seat across from him.
“I guess I was nervous,” he answered honestly. Aoi sipped on his water, feeling somewhat embarrassed for Uruha’s sake. His answer not only came off vulnerable but also awkward.
“You eat here often?”
“Mhm,” he nodded. “I like this place. It’s calm and food is good and Mrs. Nakata is nice.” Picking up a napkin, Uruha started to nervously fold it.
“Why are you nervous?” Aoi asked in a low voice. He leaned forward slightly.
“I don’t know,” he looked up. And for a second, they just sat there looking directly in each other’s eyes.
Mrs. Nakata, coming back with the menus and the water pitcher, handed the boys them before filling up Uruha’s glass. “Would you young men like something else to drink? Tea? Soda?”
“Sake, please,” Uruha looked up at her and smiled.
She placed a soft hand on his shoulder. “Sure,” she said before turning back to fetch him some.
“You folded a crane,” Aoi smirked, looking down at it.
“It’s the only thing I know how to make. I’m sorry if I’m boring,” he was hunched over, fixing the creases of the crane.
“You aren’t boring.”
“You don’t have to lie.”
“If you don’t say anything, I’ll just watch you breathe,” he laughed slightly.
“Is that a joke?”
“Actually, no.”
Mrs. Hakata came back and set the bottle of sake down along with a several small cups to drink it from. “Have you picked what you wanted to eat yet?”
“My usual,” Uruha answered.
“Alright,” she pulled out her notepad and started writing it down. “And you?”
“Uh… I’ll have…” he quickly opened it and picked one of the dinner specials.
She scribbled it down and said another sweet “alright” before heading over to the kitchen to give the orders to the cook.
“What do people talk about on dates…” Uruha said aloud to himself.
“Don’t think of it like that. You’re Uruha. I’m Aoi. Leave it at that,” he poured him some sake as well as himself.
“Um…”
“Have you figured out anything else about those effectors?” Aoi asked, thinking quickly of a topic that would engage him and make him feel at ease. The guitar was the only thing that without fail, would keep his attention and focus. He became so absorbed in talking about it, that he would even forget the person he was speaking to-at least, that’s how it seemed.
“Oh! Actually about that!” He looked up at Aoi with bright, excited eyes who seeing him about to embark on a long explanation, smiled to himself.
***
Kai arrived at the Moon Lady with a bouquet of purple irises. Taking a deep breath, he stepped through the doors and walked across the restaurant. It was 5 in the evening, the busiest hour for the restaurant and it was packed to the brim with patrons who seeing the familiar young man with the flowers in hand, looked up and stared at him as he made his way to the back to find Haru.
The first thing he came upon however wasn’t the pretty young girl. Instead it was the Yamada brothers standing in the hallway, shoulder to shoulder as an angry Mr. Hirano scolded them. Quickly, Kai hid the flowers behind his back.
“If you mess with him again, I’ll wring both of your necks,” he threatened. Since it was spoken from his mouth, the more violent the threatened punishment, the more mild the crime.
“What happened?” Kai asked, his arms stiff as he held the irises.
“Oh, these little tricksters thought it was funny to crack open a couple of eggs on D’Marcus’ windshield wipers so that when he turned them on, it smudged everywhere. They are lucky that that boy is gentle and easy-going because he is big enough to whoop both their asses in heartbeat. Too bad he doesn’t have a temper, I would have loved to see you two go down like two schmoes in a Bruce Lee flick,” he waved a finger in both of their faces. If they had a third brother with big curly hair, they would have looked like the Japanese version of the Three Stooges.
“Yeah…they are lucky…” Kai agreed as he inched his way pass them. He had his back toward the wall as he sidestepped. It was painfully obvious that he was hiding something behind him.
Mr. Hirano narrowed his eyes and rubbing his round belly said to him. “Whatcha got there Uke?”
“Nothing!” he chirped in a high pitched voice. Finally, he stood in front of the door to the staff room. Opening it with his back against it, he stepped backward and quickly shut the door.
“What the hell?” D asked, looking up from the book he was reading.
Kai breathed deeply. “Man, that was close,” he turned and smiled at him. D’s eyes were resting on the flowers. “Oh, these,” he lifted them up. “They are for Haru.”
“Really?” His disdain was rather easily noticeable in his tone.
“Um…okay…” Kai didn’t feel like asking. Changing the subject, he asked “Whatcha reading?”
“It’s a text book on Heian style architecture. Right now, I’m reading about the different types of wood.”
“Oh. Interesting,” Kai smiled. He no idea what the hell he was talking about. It sounded vaguely familiar but he forgot most of what he learned in history class. “Do you know where she is by any chance?”
With a deep sigh, D leaned back in his chair. “Kai, don’t.”
“What?” he looked up at him, his large eyes surprised.
“She doesn’t like you at all. She told me.”
“You talked about me?” to D’s ears, he sounded somewhat angry.
“Well…sort of,” he couldn’t necessarily lie to Kai. Besides, he wasn’t the deceptive type. Even if it hurt him or put him in a disagreeable situation, he always told the truth-at least, that’s what he thought of himself. On closer inspection however, he would have realized that this supposedly good feature of his personality was actually brought forth from his lack of will to change things. Unlike Kai whose energy was like a rushing rapid or a waterfall, D was similar to a calm, old lake.
“Sort of?” Kai pressed. He moved toward him.
Looking up at his face, he apprehensively replied “Well, I brought it up to her when my uncle and I were having dinner at their house. It was just me and her in the kitchen. I asked her why she ignores your obvious,” he gestured toward him before looking away and finishing his sentence. “Feelings,” he said unsure if that was the right word or not.
“And?”
“She said that she would feel bad rejecting you…” he couldn’t meet his gaze. He felt horrible for relaying these things to him.
“Well, I just have to convince her to give me a chance,” Kai said optimistically.
“Kai…”
“What?”
“Please, don’t.”
“Why not?”
D’Marcus could feel Kai’s growing temper. He lifted up his hands submissively and said in a soft voice “you’re not going to convince her.”
“Well, I have to try. I can’t just give up.” Suddenly a thought occurred to Kai. “You aren’t thinking about getting with her, are you?”
“God no!” he said. Realizing that he had replied too quickly and in such an aggressive manner, he added “Just trust me when I say you’re too good for her.”
“Excuse me?” Fuck, D realized. That was the wrong thing to say.
“No-no-no, I mean-I mean,” he fumbled for the words in Japanese. “She isn’t as sweet as you think she is and-and…I think you should be with someone who can see what you’re worth.”
Kai stared at him speechless. Fuck, fuck, fuck, D cussed inside his head. That was the wrong thing too, wasn’t it? Kai didn’t know that he was referring to what Haru had said to him the night before. His words came out instead as sounding tinged with a confession of his own.
“D’Marcus,” Kai said slowly. Fuck, he’s mad at me, he thought. Seeing the flash of aggression in his big black eyes, D’Marcus was certain that he had messed it all up. “I’m not gay, alright?”
“What?” He didn’t expect that.
“I’m not interested in you,” he spat out each syllable as if it were a threat.
“I didn’t-I didn’t mean…” Why did that hurt his feelings? D looked away. He couldn’t bare the confrontation anymore.
Almost like a morbid godsend, Haru walked into the staff room and seeing the two of them there talking, stood there glued to where she was. “D’Marcus, Yutaka,” she greeted them in a voice soft and barely audible.
“Haru,” Kai said sweetly. D hearing the shift in his tone felt a sick feeling creep up in his stomach. “Can I talk to you?”
“I’ll leave,” D’Marcus said, quickly closing his book and shoving it in his bag. He heard Haru whimper his name as he walked passed her, his head low as he avoided her stare.
Kai watched from a far and seeing the look of longing in her eyes as she gazed upon D’s handsome face, he felt as if he were about to lose before he even began. Not one to quit easily, he took a deep breath as he prepared himself to meet his challenge. As soon as D’Marcus had left, Kai picking up the flowers presented them to her. “These are for you,” he said.
She stared at them for several seconds silently before walking slowly over to him and talking them from his hand. “Thank you,” she said as she began to rearrange them lovingly. Kai, naively took that as a good sign.
“Haru, I know you know how I feel about you and I know how you feel about him.” She didn’t say anything. Taking another deep breath, he continued “But I think that if you give me the chance, you might actually find that I can make you happy and that I am the right person for you. Whatever you need, I will give you. I’ll protect you and look after you. When you are sad, I won’t stop until you smile. I may not seem like much but I want you to know that inside me, there is a passion for more.”
This was perfect. His speech was perfect, his earnestness, his dedication. It was like something out of a Hollywood Movie, the dream romance. The charming young man, presenting flowers to the pretty girl and eloquently spilling out his soul. If D were still in the room, he might have puked.
“Yutaka…” She said with a thin smile. “My feelings for D’Marcus…they don’t bother you?”
“I hope over time, I can win your heart.” Of course, they bothered him but he was determined. He was optimistic. He believed in himself.
Deep down, she knew that it was wrong but she believed firmly in her mind that he had convinced her, that her motives to open herself up to him had been pure. Truthfully though, it was the fantasy that made her look up and say to him “Okay.” She had the sense within her that this was only the beginning. And it excited her.
She wasn’t ready to let go of D’Marcus. When Kai smiled beautiful at her, she only held onto her love tighter.
***
After dinner, they went to the movie theater. Looking at what they offered, Aoi just smoked a cigarette confused as he stared up at the marquee. He didn’t pay attention to what was out. “You pick. I don’t care,” he said.
“Reita said he liked the second one so that means that it probably isn’t very good.”
Aoi laughed. “Probably not.”
“I’ll just ask the ticket girl which one is good,” Uruha said. He walked up to the window. Aoi followed behind him. “Excuse me,” he said leaning in. “We want to watch a movie now but we don’t know what to see. Which one do you recommend?”
The girl looked at him and then back at Aoi. Her eyes lingered on the latter.
“Stop,” Uruha said to her aggressively.
“I’m sorry,” she titled her head surprised. She was in her early 20s and moderately attractive. “Are you two together together?” she raised her eyebrows suggestively.
Not bothering to answer her question, he repeated “Which movie is good?”
“I like White Melody,” she pointed to a poster. It was obviously one of those depressing Japanese romances where the girl has some sort of disability like she is confined to a wheel chair or she’s blind and she meets some guy and forever changes his life with touching, deep dialogue about the transience of happiness.
“Okay,” he agreed without even looking at the promotional poster. He quickly paid for two tickets. She chuckled as she handed over the two little red paper rectangles. He gave Aoi his. “Here,” he said.
“Good. You picked one,” he smiled at him. “Let’s go.”
Uruha walked through the glass doors first. Before Aoi could pass, the ticket girl whispered loudly at him “Hey!” He stopped in his tracks and looked at her inquiringly. “Is he your boyfriend?” she asked with a mischievous smile. She seemed really excited by the prospect.
“Um…” Aoi wasn’t sure how he should answer. “Yeah?”
“Awwww you two are so hot together!” she giggled.
“Thank you?”
Overly pleased with his answer, she popped up her shoulder happily. “Have fun!” she waved at him.
When the guy who directed them to their theater saw their tickets, he gave them a queer look before sending them on their way. Since they had just eaten, they didn’t bother to go to the concession stand. Inside the big dark room, lit dimly by the yellow glow over the gigantic screen currently projecting no images, Aoi insisted that they sit all the way in the back.
It didn’t take long for the film to begin. They sat there quietly as they were forced to watch ridiculously loud trailers for other movies. Aoi tonguing his lip ring looked around at all the other people in the theater and realized that besides for one old dude in the front who looked like he wrote movie reviews for the paper and was therefore forced to be there, the whole theater was filled with girls.
Within the first 10 minutes of the film, Aoi was already bored out of his mind. He hated these kinds of movies. There was barely any dialogue and people for the most part, just stood in the frame staring at other people or just walked around as if they had no place to be. As soon as the female protagonist-a girl who had just woken up from a coma that deprived her of her early teen years started a speech about how the world seemed so different from her innocent perspective, Aoi almost slapped himself in the face.
“You have the eyes of a child,” her love interest said.
“Fuck me,” Aoi whispered. He turned and looked at the side of Uruha’s face. To his great surprise, he actually looked into it. He was pouting and his eyes were glittering in the light as if they were somewhat damp.
Aoi reached over and placed a hand on his knee. Uruha sweetly turned and smiled at him quickly before going back to watching the movie. Slowly, he inched his hand upward and inward until he was almost touching Uruha’s crotch.
“What are you doing?” Uru whispered.
“Entertaining myself.”
“Watch the movie.”
“It sucks.”
“I like it.”
“It sucks.” Since Uruha hadn’t pushed his hand away, he started undoing the button to his jeans.
“What are you trying to do?”
“Just be quiet, okay?” Aoi giggled.
“We’ll get in trouble.”
A person, who was sitting several rows in front of them, turned around and whispered angrily “SHHHH.”
Uruha was torn. He didn’t want to mess around in the theater nor did he want to push Aoi away. Since he failed to make a choice, Aoi continued. Getting down in front of him on his knees, Aoi slowly and with skill, tugged his pants down.
“Please don’t,” Uruha begged.
“Live a little,” he smirked evilly. Pulling Uruha’s penis out, he looked around to make sure no one was looking. Rubbing him a couple of times with his hand, Aoi lowered his head and began to suck him off.
Suppressing his moans, Uruha squirmed in his chair. There was something about doing it in public that made it feel better. The cavern of Aoi’s mouth was wetter, his tongue more velvety and his sucking had more pressure. When he put him entirely into his mouth, pushing the tip of his penis into the back of his throat, Uruha clenched his teeth and threw his head back.
Lovingly, Aoi rubbed the insides of Uruha’s clothed thighs. And Uruha, feeling he needed to reciprocate him in some way, started to lightly tug at his hair like he used to when they were younger, opening and closing his hands in a kneading like fashion. Aoi moaned happily.
Melodramatic music started to play from the movie as the male protagonist ran through the streets of Tokyo after finding out that somewhat randomly the girl that he was in love with, unable to bare the adult world, offed herself. He threw himself onto the sidewalk and almost as if it were timed, he screamed to the ocean-why he was there, no one in the audience knew “I LOVE YOU!” just when Uruha, unable to bear it anymore moaned loudly as he came.
[A/N Posting early because I won't be home at 3. ^-^]
Author: Zion Shadowlet
Beta: butterflysaga(the bitch)
Characters: Aoi, Uruha, Ruki, Reita, Kai and many OCs (Fuwa etc.)
Pairing: Aoi/Uruha and more~
Genre: Drama, Romance, Friendship, Comedy
Rating: NC17
Summary: Six years have passed since the summer at the Dazai Bright Future Retreat for Troubled Children. The boys meet in an unexpected way perhaps bound by fate in the underground world of Visual Kei. With broken hearts and promises; the boys-now young men look to regain some of what they lost by the wild and reckless pursuit of the same dream.
Previous Parts: Part 1.1 | Part 1.2 | Part 2 | Part 3 | Part 4.1| Part 4.2| Part 5| Part 6| Part 7.1| Part 7.2| Part 8.1| Part 8.2| Part 9| Part 10| Part 11| Part 12| Part 13| Part 14| Part 15
Without fail, Lie:Death had their usual meeting. Each member of course was there on time, never more than 5 minutes past the 8 AM starting time. For a group of very young men, they were surprisingly professional and serious. The main song writers: the singer and the lead guitarist would present any new compositions and then they would go through them, meticulously critiquing every subtle aspect. Once that was finished, they would work on other material until they exhausted their capacity to improve it. Since many of the members held jobs, they scheduled practice late at night 4 days during the week. The other three days they would be performing at local venues.
They were like a well-oiled machine. And since each member was good at their job and knew what their job was, it seemed to all who had seen them and knew about them, that they were destined for great things. They weren’t like these other bands that goofed around, talking about nothing of any import, only to squeeze in a couple hours of actual work as they were all about to head out the door, wasting the good portion of the rehearsal time on chatter and immature jokes. No, Lie:Death was certainly not one of those bands at all. They were promising.
Kai always found these meetings tiring. They seemed to drain his energy faster than lives. Without the fans there, he felt as if every second of his concentration had to be forced out from his sheer willpower. Deep down, he wondered if he was the weakest member of the band. The others all seemed content with how things were. It was almost as if they didn’t find the meetings boring or taxing, almost as if they lived their lives like this, every moment in serious discussion on music. He perhaps would have cracked a joke or talked more about himself if he didn’t wonder that he was subpar compared to the others. Often times, he couldn’t quite understand what they were saying or talking about. He wasn’t as well educated in music as they were, especially Yukio, their lead guitarist. He was a musical genius-at least, that’s how the others saw him. He carried about him an air of greatness. In his presence, Kai for the most part was silent. It was enough for him to know that Yukio thought him a good enough drummer to be in Lie:Death.
As usual, as 10 AM inched closer and closer, Kai would watch the clock, waiting for the scheduled 20 minute break. As soon as the minute hand struck the 12, he jumped to his feet.
“Oh, looks like it’s 10,” Yukio said without any trace of emotion. The group dispersed in various ways, some going to the bathroom, others to the kitchen to get something to eat. Kai, however starved for social interaction went outside and decided to call someone. Scanning his lists of contacts, he decided that he might as well call Ruki. Pressing the talk button on Fuwa’s house number, he put the cell phone to his ear and listened to the ring.
“Hello?” Mr. Fuwa said on the other side.
“Hey! Fuwa! It’s me Kai.”
“Hey,” he laughed happily. In background, he could tell that he was in the kitchen and he could hear the sound of someone playing the piano stiffly. “How are you?”
“I’m good. How are you?”
“I’m good. How are your mother and sister?”
“Great actually!” He didn’t realize how nice it would be to speak to Fuwa again. Hearing his voice, he felt as if he could say anything. Even over the phone, he had this comforting and paternal presence. “My mom is healthy and my sister is going to college to be a nurse.”
“That’s wonderful. I’m really happy to hear that.”
“Yeah, she had a hard time at first but like my mom, she’s stronger than she looks.”
“It must run in the family,” Fuwa said sweetly.
“I heard about Kuramoto.”
“Yes. It’s…” he sighed. “It’s hard even now. I mean, I know he was old but I knew him for a very long time. Some days, I think that he is still alive,” Fuwa went quiet. In his mind, he wasn’t really thinking about his good friend Kuramoto even though he still greatly missed him. Rather, he had a sense of foreboding in him that wouldn’t let him not think about Isao. He had the feeling that he would be saying the same thing about his husband. In that moment, as he sensed what was to be, the future was bleak and empty.
“I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have brought it up,” the young man said apologetically on the other side.
“It’s alright, Kai. It is better to talk about these things,” he replied, his voice kind and understanding. Gathering his strength, he asked, changing the subject “You’re in a band now?”
“Yes. I play drums.”
“That’s great.” Kai could hear him messing with something on the stove.
“You’re cooking?”
“Late breakfast. Isao doesn’t eat in the morning and I usually just have coffee and toast but now that Ruki’s here, he is always complaining about how no one cooks,” he laughed. “So, I’m making him and myself breakfast.”
“Is that him playing the piano?” A feeling of contentment came over Kai as he thought about Ruki sitting there around the kitchen table drinking orange juice and eating breakfast, Fuwa sitting there across from him, asking him about his day. He wondered if his friend ever had relaxing moments like that in his life.
“Yes! That’s him. Actually, he had no idea what he was doing when he sat down but it sounds like he is beginning to figure the thing out. Would you like to talk to him? I’m assuming that’s why you called,” the older man said amiably.
“Yeah, I would like to.”
“Ruki! Phone!” he called out.
“Who is it?” Ruki asked, somewhat irritated.
“Kai.”
The piano went quiet in the background as Ruki made his way to the kitchen to get the phone. “How much longer?” Kai could hear him ask Fuwa.
“5 minutes? Something like that.”
Grabbing the phone, Ruki said “Hey. What’s up?” He could hear him take a seat at the table.
“Just calling on my break.”
“Are you at the restaurant?”
“It’s a band meeting,” he answered wearily.
“What’s wrong? You sound tired. Was there a fight?”
“No, they aren’t the most social people,” Kai laughed.
“Oh, so they are boring?” Ruki hungry, started picking out little things of fruit from a bowl that Fuwa had placed on the table. He purposely picked out all the mulberries first.
“Just a bit. But I can’t complain. We get a lot of work done.”
“I see.” Ruki couldn’t help but think that if it wasn’t fun, then why the hell were they doing it? But as soon as that thought crossed his mind, he felt ashamed of himself. He ought to be admiring their work ethic even though it seemed void of any enjoyment. His last band’s meetings were boring and tiresome too he remembered. As he started on the blueberries, he promised himself that he was never going to work with a musician who he found irritating or dull.
“How’s the drummer search coming along?” Kai asked.
“Aoi found this guy that’s interested. We’re supposed to check him out I think. At least, that’s what I’ve been told. I don’t know when though. He hasn’t given me the details. Fuwa,” Ruki suddenly said. “I hate strawberries. Don’t buy them anymore.” Kai could hear him throwing their thick heavy bodies onto the surface of the table, Ruki’s distaste for them evident in the increasing and repetitive thuds.
“Isao likes them. Hey-hey-hey,” Fuwa said turning around. “Stop that.”
Kai could hear another thud. Ruki was deliberately disobeying him. He imagined him looking up at him defiantly as he suppressed an evil smile.
“If I was meaner, I’d make you eat them and I mean the ones you threw on the floor,” Fuwa laughed.
“Hey, keep it up and I’ll throw them at you,” Ruki teased. “Sorry,” he said to Kai. “Fuwa is trying to get smart with me.”
“I see,” Kai smiled.
“What are your plans for today?”
“I have to work once I get out of here at 4. I think I’m just going to go ahead and ask Haru out.”
“Seriously?!” Ruki became immediately more interested.
“Yeah. I don’t know what I am waiting for. I’m just going to lie it all down on the line.”
“You’re crazy.”
“How does that make me crazy?”
“If it was me, I’d just be quiet and pray that she starts liking me back,” Ruki laughed.
“I’m assuming that you don’t date often.”
“No, not really. Girls scare the shit out of me.”
“You aren’t helping, Ruki.”
“They are really scary. I know for a fact. I had a lot of friends that were girls and when they are mad…man, they are really really frightening. You have no idea the kinds of things girls have told me.”
“I really don’t want to know,” Kai said honestly.
“No, I mean it. They are vicious. One time-”
“Ruki, please. No.”
“You’re not interested?” Ruki was legitimately surprised. Since he befriended mostly girls, this sort of topic was general considered fascinating.
“No, I’m not. If you keep talking about it, I might chicken out.”
“Be prepared for the worst,” he said as if they were in a horror movie of sorts.
“Um…I’ll try.”
“If you go about it the wrong way…”
“I know. I know. I should be scared.” Why was Ruki so into this conversation? “Anyhow, I have to go back to the meeting before they think something is up.”
“Alrighty,” Ruki said cutely, his demeanor suddenly different. “Good luck!”
“Thanks.”
***
Uruha had given him the address to a restaurant, a cozy family run curry place with low lights and soft cushiony chairs. The waitress even was an older lady with a charming, warm smile. When he came in, she went up to him and asked him sweetly if he was alone. He said he was supposed to meet a friend there.
“Oh, how lovely!” she rested her hands on her apron and tilting her head, smiled at him once more, somewhat in the same fashion Kai would often smile. She made him feel immediately welcomed. “How about this table? It is right near the window.”
“This is perfect. Thank you,” he returned her sweet smile and sat down on the soft, red chair and looked around. There were pictures on the burnt orange walls of the restaurant from years past. In one photo that was taken in the 1970s, it looked like the waitress when she was younger. She had the same glowing gentleness.
This place wasn’t exactly what Aoi had expected. But then again, this was a date with Uruha.
“It is lovely outside, isn’t it?” The waitress said picking up an upturned glass from the table and pouring him some water. “Chilly but one can smell the coming of warm weather.”
“It’s nice,” he agreed politely.
“Can I get you anything else?”
“No, this is perfect.”
Uncharacteristically early, Uruha walked in the door. It was 4:45. Aoi was expecting him in from anywhere between a half hour to a full hour. He was usually late with all things, taking his sweet time to get ready or to leave.
“Kouyou!” the waitress said with yet again another sweet smile.
“Mrs. Nakata,” he bowed.
“Where is your sister?”
“Oh, I um…eating with a friend tonight.” Seeing Aoi sitting there, looking back over his shoulder at him, Uruha gestured toward him.
“Oh! How lovely. Well, please sit down,” she said as she went to go get the menus.
“You’re early,” Aoi said as Uruha took his seat across from him.
“I guess I was nervous,” he answered honestly. Aoi sipped on his water, feeling somewhat embarrassed for Uruha’s sake. His answer not only came off vulnerable but also awkward.
“You eat here often?”
“Mhm,” he nodded. “I like this place. It’s calm and food is good and Mrs. Nakata is nice.” Picking up a napkin, Uruha started to nervously fold it.
“Why are you nervous?” Aoi asked in a low voice. He leaned forward slightly.
“I don’t know,” he looked up. And for a second, they just sat there looking directly in each other’s eyes.
Mrs. Nakata, coming back with the menus and the water pitcher, handed the boys them before filling up Uruha’s glass. “Would you young men like something else to drink? Tea? Soda?”
“Sake, please,” Uruha looked up at her and smiled.
She placed a soft hand on his shoulder. “Sure,” she said before turning back to fetch him some.
“You folded a crane,” Aoi smirked, looking down at it.
“It’s the only thing I know how to make. I’m sorry if I’m boring,” he was hunched over, fixing the creases of the crane.
“You aren’t boring.”
“You don’t have to lie.”
“If you don’t say anything, I’ll just watch you breathe,” he laughed slightly.
“Is that a joke?”
“Actually, no.”
Mrs. Hakata came back and set the bottle of sake down along with a several small cups to drink it from. “Have you picked what you wanted to eat yet?”
“My usual,” Uruha answered.
“Alright,” she pulled out her notepad and started writing it down. “And you?”
“Uh… I’ll have…” he quickly opened it and picked one of the dinner specials.
She scribbled it down and said another sweet “alright” before heading over to the kitchen to give the orders to the cook.
“What do people talk about on dates…” Uruha said aloud to himself.
“Don’t think of it like that. You’re Uruha. I’m Aoi. Leave it at that,” he poured him some sake as well as himself.
“Um…”
“Have you figured out anything else about those effectors?” Aoi asked, thinking quickly of a topic that would engage him and make him feel at ease. The guitar was the only thing that without fail, would keep his attention and focus. He became so absorbed in talking about it, that he would even forget the person he was speaking to-at least, that’s how it seemed.
“Oh! Actually about that!” He looked up at Aoi with bright, excited eyes who seeing him about to embark on a long explanation, smiled to himself.
***
Kai arrived at the Moon Lady with a bouquet of purple irises. Taking a deep breath, he stepped through the doors and walked across the restaurant. It was 5 in the evening, the busiest hour for the restaurant and it was packed to the brim with patrons who seeing the familiar young man with the flowers in hand, looked up and stared at him as he made his way to the back to find Haru.
The first thing he came upon however wasn’t the pretty young girl. Instead it was the Yamada brothers standing in the hallway, shoulder to shoulder as an angry Mr. Hirano scolded them. Quickly, Kai hid the flowers behind his back.
“If you mess with him again, I’ll wring both of your necks,” he threatened. Since it was spoken from his mouth, the more violent the threatened punishment, the more mild the crime.
“What happened?” Kai asked, his arms stiff as he held the irises.
“Oh, these little tricksters thought it was funny to crack open a couple of eggs on D’Marcus’ windshield wipers so that when he turned them on, it smudged everywhere. They are lucky that that boy is gentle and easy-going because he is big enough to whoop both their asses in heartbeat. Too bad he doesn’t have a temper, I would have loved to see you two go down like two schmoes in a Bruce Lee flick,” he waved a finger in both of their faces. If they had a third brother with big curly hair, they would have looked like the Japanese version of the Three Stooges.
“Yeah…they are lucky…” Kai agreed as he inched his way pass them. He had his back toward the wall as he sidestepped. It was painfully obvious that he was hiding something behind him.
Mr. Hirano narrowed his eyes and rubbing his round belly said to him. “Whatcha got there Uke?”
“Nothing!” he chirped in a high pitched voice. Finally, he stood in front of the door to the staff room. Opening it with his back against it, he stepped backward and quickly shut the door.
“What the hell?” D asked, looking up from the book he was reading.
Kai breathed deeply. “Man, that was close,” he turned and smiled at him. D’s eyes were resting on the flowers. “Oh, these,” he lifted them up. “They are for Haru.”
“Really?” His disdain was rather easily noticeable in his tone.
“Um…okay…” Kai didn’t feel like asking. Changing the subject, he asked “Whatcha reading?”
“It’s a text book on Heian style architecture. Right now, I’m reading about the different types of wood.”
“Oh. Interesting,” Kai smiled. He no idea what the hell he was talking about. It sounded vaguely familiar but he forgot most of what he learned in history class. “Do you know where she is by any chance?”
With a deep sigh, D leaned back in his chair. “Kai, don’t.”
“What?” he looked up at him, his large eyes surprised.
“She doesn’t like you at all. She told me.”
“You talked about me?” to D’s ears, he sounded somewhat angry.
“Well…sort of,” he couldn’t necessarily lie to Kai. Besides, he wasn’t the deceptive type. Even if it hurt him or put him in a disagreeable situation, he always told the truth-at least, that’s what he thought of himself. On closer inspection however, he would have realized that this supposedly good feature of his personality was actually brought forth from his lack of will to change things. Unlike Kai whose energy was like a rushing rapid or a waterfall, D was similar to a calm, old lake.
“Sort of?” Kai pressed. He moved toward him.
Looking up at his face, he apprehensively replied “Well, I brought it up to her when my uncle and I were having dinner at their house. It was just me and her in the kitchen. I asked her why she ignores your obvious,” he gestured toward him before looking away and finishing his sentence. “Feelings,” he said unsure if that was the right word or not.
“And?”
“She said that she would feel bad rejecting you…” he couldn’t meet his gaze. He felt horrible for relaying these things to him.
“Well, I just have to convince her to give me a chance,” Kai said optimistically.
“Kai…”
“What?”
“Please, don’t.”
“Why not?”
D’Marcus could feel Kai’s growing temper. He lifted up his hands submissively and said in a soft voice “you’re not going to convince her.”
“Well, I have to try. I can’t just give up.” Suddenly a thought occurred to Kai. “You aren’t thinking about getting with her, are you?”
“God no!” he said. Realizing that he had replied too quickly and in such an aggressive manner, he added “Just trust me when I say you’re too good for her.”
“Excuse me?” Fuck, D realized. That was the wrong thing to say.
“No-no-no, I mean-I mean,” he fumbled for the words in Japanese. “She isn’t as sweet as you think she is and-and…I think you should be with someone who can see what you’re worth.”
Kai stared at him speechless. Fuck, fuck, fuck, D cussed inside his head. That was the wrong thing too, wasn’t it? Kai didn’t know that he was referring to what Haru had said to him the night before. His words came out instead as sounding tinged with a confession of his own.
“D’Marcus,” Kai said slowly. Fuck, he’s mad at me, he thought. Seeing the flash of aggression in his big black eyes, D’Marcus was certain that he had messed it all up. “I’m not gay, alright?”
“What?” He didn’t expect that.
“I’m not interested in you,” he spat out each syllable as if it were a threat.
“I didn’t-I didn’t mean…” Why did that hurt his feelings? D looked away. He couldn’t bare the confrontation anymore.
Almost like a morbid godsend, Haru walked into the staff room and seeing the two of them there talking, stood there glued to where she was. “D’Marcus, Yutaka,” she greeted them in a voice soft and barely audible.
“Haru,” Kai said sweetly. D hearing the shift in his tone felt a sick feeling creep up in his stomach. “Can I talk to you?”
“I’ll leave,” D’Marcus said, quickly closing his book and shoving it in his bag. He heard Haru whimper his name as he walked passed her, his head low as he avoided her stare.
Kai watched from a far and seeing the look of longing in her eyes as she gazed upon D’s handsome face, he felt as if he were about to lose before he even began. Not one to quit easily, he took a deep breath as he prepared himself to meet his challenge. As soon as D’Marcus had left, Kai picking up the flowers presented them to her. “These are for you,” he said.
She stared at them for several seconds silently before walking slowly over to him and talking them from his hand. “Thank you,” she said as she began to rearrange them lovingly. Kai, naively took that as a good sign.
“Haru, I know you know how I feel about you and I know how you feel about him.” She didn’t say anything. Taking another deep breath, he continued “But I think that if you give me the chance, you might actually find that I can make you happy and that I am the right person for you. Whatever you need, I will give you. I’ll protect you and look after you. When you are sad, I won’t stop until you smile. I may not seem like much but I want you to know that inside me, there is a passion for more.”
This was perfect. His speech was perfect, his earnestness, his dedication. It was like something out of a Hollywood Movie, the dream romance. The charming young man, presenting flowers to the pretty girl and eloquently spilling out his soul. If D were still in the room, he might have puked.
“Yutaka…” She said with a thin smile. “My feelings for D’Marcus…they don’t bother you?”
“I hope over time, I can win your heart.” Of course, they bothered him but he was determined. He was optimistic. He believed in himself.
Deep down, she knew that it was wrong but she believed firmly in her mind that he had convinced her, that her motives to open herself up to him had been pure. Truthfully though, it was the fantasy that made her look up and say to him “Okay.” She had the sense within her that this was only the beginning. And it excited her.
She wasn’t ready to let go of D’Marcus. When Kai smiled beautiful at her, she only held onto her love tighter.
***
After dinner, they went to the movie theater. Looking at what they offered, Aoi just smoked a cigarette confused as he stared up at the marquee. He didn’t pay attention to what was out. “You pick. I don’t care,” he said.
“Reita said he liked the second one so that means that it probably isn’t very good.”
Aoi laughed. “Probably not.”
“I’ll just ask the ticket girl which one is good,” Uruha said. He walked up to the window. Aoi followed behind him. “Excuse me,” he said leaning in. “We want to watch a movie now but we don’t know what to see. Which one do you recommend?”
The girl looked at him and then back at Aoi. Her eyes lingered on the latter.
“Stop,” Uruha said to her aggressively.
“I’m sorry,” she titled her head surprised. She was in her early 20s and moderately attractive. “Are you two together together?” she raised her eyebrows suggestively.
Not bothering to answer her question, he repeated “Which movie is good?”
“I like White Melody,” she pointed to a poster. It was obviously one of those depressing Japanese romances where the girl has some sort of disability like she is confined to a wheel chair or she’s blind and she meets some guy and forever changes his life with touching, deep dialogue about the transience of happiness.
“Okay,” he agreed without even looking at the promotional poster. He quickly paid for two tickets. She chuckled as she handed over the two little red paper rectangles. He gave Aoi his. “Here,” he said.
“Good. You picked one,” he smiled at him. “Let’s go.”
Uruha walked through the glass doors first. Before Aoi could pass, the ticket girl whispered loudly at him “Hey!” He stopped in his tracks and looked at her inquiringly. “Is he your boyfriend?” she asked with a mischievous smile. She seemed really excited by the prospect.
“Um…” Aoi wasn’t sure how he should answer. “Yeah?”
“Awwww you two are so hot together!” she giggled.
“Thank you?”
Overly pleased with his answer, she popped up her shoulder happily. “Have fun!” she waved at him.
When the guy who directed them to their theater saw their tickets, he gave them a queer look before sending them on their way. Since they had just eaten, they didn’t bother to go to the concession stand. Inside the big dark room, lit dimly by the yellow glow over the gigantic screen currently projecting no images, Aoi insisted that they sit all the way in the back.
It didn’t take long for the film to begin. They sat there quietly as they were forced to watch ridiculously loud trailers for other movies. Aoi tonguing his lip ring looked around at all the other people in the theater and realized that besides for one old dude in the front who looked like he wrote movie reviews for the paper and was therefore forced to be there, the whole theater was filled with girls.
Within the first 10 minutes of the film, Aoi was already bored out of his mind. He hated these kinds of movies. There was barely any dialogue and people for the most part, just stood in the frame staring at other people or just walked around as if they had no place to be. As soon as the female protagonist-a girl who had just woken up from a coma that deprived her of her early teen years started a speech about how the world seemed so different from her innocent perspective, Aoi almost slapped himself in the face.
“You have the eyes of a child,” her love interest said.
“Fuck me,” Aoi whispered. He turned and looked at the side of Uruha’s face. To his great surprise, he actually looked into it. He was pouting and his eyes were glittering in the light as if they were somewhat damp.
Aoi reached over and placed a hand on his knee. Uruha sweetly turned and smiled at him quickly before going back to watching the movie. Slowly, he inched his hand upward and inward until he was almost touching Uruha’s crotch.
“What are you doing?” Uru whispered.
“Entertaining myself.”
“Watch the movie.”
“It sucks.”
“I like it.”
“It sucks.” Since Uruha hadn’t pushed his hand away, he started undoing the button to his jeans.
“What are you trying to do?”
“Just be quiet, okay?” Aoi giggled.
“We’ll get in trouble.”
A person, who was sitting several rows in front of them, turned around and whispered angrily “SHHHH.”
Uruha was torn. He didn’t want to mess around in the theater nor did he want to push Aoi away. Since he failed to make a choice, Aoi continued. Getting down in front of him on his knees, Aoi slowly and with skill, tugged his pants down.
“Please don’t,” Uruha begged.
“Live a little,” he smirked evilly. Pulling Uruha’s penis out, he looked around to make sure no one was looking. Rubbing him a couple of times with his hand, Aoi lowered his head and began to suck him off.
Suppressing his moans, Uruha squirmed in his chair. There was something about doing it in public that made it feel better. The cavern of Aoi’s mouth was wetter, his tongue more velvety and his sucking had more pressure. When he put him entirely into his mouth, pushing the tip of his penis into the back of his throat, Uruha clenched his teeth and threw his head back.
Lovingly, Aoi rubbed the insides of Uruha’s clothed thighs. And Uruha, feeling he needed to reciprocate him in some way, started to lightly tug at his hair like he used to when they were younger, opening and closing his hands in a kneading like fashion. Aoi moaned happily.
Melodramatic music started to play from the movie as the male protagonist ran through the streets of Tokyo after finding out that somewhat randomly the girl that he was in love with, unable to bare the adult world, offed herself. He threw himself onto the sidewalk and almost as if it were timed, he screamed to the ocean-why he was there, no one in the audience knew “I LOVE YOU!” just when Uruha, unable to bear it anymore moaned loudly as he came.
[A/N Posting early because I won't be home at 3. ^-^]