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My friends, it pains me to learn that most of you seem to have been taken in by the devious lie being perpetrated that somehow places me, an innocent bystander, as the true culprit of this heinous panty-snatching. I know that a man of justice and righteousness like me has a lot of enemies, but I never could have imagined that one would be so bold ( Read more... ) -
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[not filtered in the slightest]
Well well well! It must be my birthday. Either that or Mrs. Claus is looking for a little something extra in her stocking.
Whoever was so kind as to grace me with this offering, I should point out that as much as I appreciate it, there's really no need to be shy! Like a Mexican gardener, I tenderly care for any flower ( Read more... ) -
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My, words cannot express how nice it is to get out of that disgusting uniform. Pantsless? Velour? Honestly, what was I thinking?
I really must apologize for the way I've acted since arriving here. I suppose it's not much better than you could expect from any other male pig, but really, my behavior was inexcusable. To think that I could actually be ( Read more... ) -
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I suppose now is as good a time as any to mention that I am now fully, undoubtedly, 100% employed. Henceforth I am no longer a lonely, out-of-work pathetic loser, but rather an equally lonely, career secure pathetic... Ahem.
Anyway, I am now promoted to the glorious position of boat captain. It's only a matter of time before the steering wheel of ( Read more... ) -
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...and that was the second time I got crabs. Anyway, after that we picked up some nuns and-
And.
...
Somewhere...
Something very horrible has just happened. -
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Giant women roaming around now, eh?
This place is beginning to feel more and more like home already. Now then! Who do I talk to for the snu snu? -
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Amazonia, hmm? Fascinating place. Full of ancient, mysterious customs, as well as thighs like tree trunks. I'm quite glad I remembered that particular peccadillo. Never accept a dinner invitation from a woman with a name like "Oonga". That has to be how it happened. Damn my desperate charitable attitude towards the rituals of courtship!
For the ( Read more... ) -
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Um. I wanted to, um. Thank Izuru for being so nice to me. Even if nobody else is. I'm feeling kind of better today. M-Maybe I might even leave the room. I-It's a little scary with all these girls around, but um, th-they won't hurt me, right? I-I have nothing to be afraid of. Yes. Nothing.
...Oh, hey, um, I think I'm getting a memory! The planet... " ( Read more... ) -
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Ngh...
S-Something's... wrong. Why didn't I think of it earlier!? I-I've been running around acting like an idiot on this island f-f-full of really strong people and bird-men and demons and, and, and other people, and-
G-g-g-girls. *shiver* What was I thinking? Antagonizing people like that, even... even hitting on girls, urk...
This- this isn't safe ( Read more... ) -
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OH GOD!
Like everyone else, I too have been affected by the island's magical mojo! My boundless reserves of raw courage and male bravado have been stripped from me. Like a crawling baby bird, I am helpless and meek! I will require hugs and nurturing. From women. Men, some money to help ease my psychological pain would be nice.
I'm just- *sniff* so- * ( Read more... )