Sawajiri Legacy ;; Generation 3.3
Warnings:
Foul Language
Adult Themes
Past Updates:
1.1 1.2 1.3 1.4 1.5
2.1 2.2 2.3 2.4 2.5
3.1 3.2
When we last left the Sawajiri family, they had just come back from a vacation at Three Lakes. But after three days filled with relaxation and fun, will a normal life even compare?
Well, at least some of them have the ambition to keep things interesting.
Midori, taking her future into her own hands, invites the headmaster of the local private school over for dinner. Because seriously, rich kids should not be going to public school.
He seems to be a fan of bathrooms.
MIDORI: Please let me into your school! I have a grade point average of 4.0 because I feel the need to overcompensate because of my uncaring parents. Honestly, I'd be a blessing to have in your establishment. Not only am I smart, but I'm pretty too! And... why are you in my bedroom again?
THE HEADMASTER: Well, it's certainly not because I'm a pedophile.
MIDORI: Oh, well that's good to know.
Really, it was the dinner that won him over. Mr. Roboto is like the best cook ever.
Fuck yeah.
PENGUIN: Excuse me while I just walk into your house like I own the joint.
OH, OH, THE CUTENESS! I've never seen this happen before; he's trying to reach the fish. OH FOR FUCK'S SAKE THAT'S TOO ADORABLE FOR WORDS.
NATSUKI: That things pretty smelly by now. Trust me, you don't want it. Hell, I don't want it but Takao insists. Instead, want to be my certified killing machine? My robot is so useless, you see.
PENGUIN: Stop patting my head. I WANT THE FISH, BITCH.
I get bored with rich families rather quickly, so once again it's time for a roll!
... Damnit, I liked Freya.
Anyway, considering Hiroshi has been practicing adultery for some time now, I decided to go a more direct route.
HIROSHI: Look I'm sorry, but you're fucking up my chances at eternal happiness. I need to sleep with twenty women and it's getting kind of hard doing it behind your back!
FREYA: No butterflies?!!!
HIROSHI: No butterflies! Get out of my pimp daddy house, ho!
FREYA: APOCALYPSE!!
Well, this is just depressing.
MIDORI: YOU ALL WILL DIE FOR THIS TRAVESTY AGAINST MY IMPRESSIONABLE YOUTHFULNESS!
And so Freya left the family :(
Hiroshi wasted no time getting back to his man slut ways... and yup, number eleven was sucessfully banged :D
And number twelve!
This poor robot.
In other news, Midori grew up into one hot fucking goth, so it's time for a full intro!
Captain Hero? Really? Well, whatever makes her happy...
I'm sorry, these outfits are just freaking adorable.
Meanwhile, in the bathroom...
Sakura just randomly invites herself over with the sole purpose of using thier toilet. Yeah, because THAT'S normal...
BOOYAH.
HIROSHI: Thank you, thank you. I'm amazing.
Midori, deciding that she needs some actual friends in her life, consults the gypsy matchmaker.
MIDORI: Please I beg of you, miss! I need a friend that has an actual human heartbeat; this robot just ain't cutting it!
CREEPY GYPSY: Aye, girl... it's not exactly what I'm here for, but I'll give it a shot.
CREEPY GYPSY: BIBBITY BOBBITY BOO!
SHANE: What in the f---? HOW DID I GET HERE?!
MIDORI: Hi! Look, everyone thinks I'm fucking weird and I don't know why because I think I'm super nice - I love how much of a smelly hippie you are, by the way - but anyway here, I got you a present! BE MY FRIEND??
SHANE: I always wanted a rich friend to buy me shit. SOLD.
Again, this poor, poor robot...
Okay now that's just rude. Didn't your mother ever tell you not to point and laugh at people? GOD.
Mr. Roboto didn't seem to take kindly to being laughed at though because he completely spazzed the fuck out.
... And breaks down.
TAKAO: Nuuu! My only friend is broken!!
MIDORI: Fuck this crazy house, I'm getting a job so I can move out sooner.
But Midori isn't the only one who's about to move out... only Natsuki's "moving" is a bit more on the permanent side.
GRIM REAPER: Look, I'm not even gonna lie; I appreciate how evil you are inside and how many people you sent to an early grave, but your time is up sweetheart.
NATSUKI: I blame this on the weakness of your species.
Money! :D
HIROSHI: Oh shiz, I'm now the only adult left in this family! This is unacceptable, considering I'm useless at being responsible.
NEXT TIME...
How will Hiroshi deal with being a proper dad, now that his mom and treasured slave robot isn't around to help?