Dear Diary~ [Page 69 - Changmin] FINAL
Title: Dear Diary~
Author: k_chan91
Disclaimer: ....Yep....it's disclaimed...xD
Parts: [69/69] (Awkward number, I know x'D)
Pairings: So far Yoosu...Yunjae...Jaemin...Jaesu...Jaechun...Jaechul...xDDD
Genre: crack....with a tiny smidgeon of angst in the middle. o.o *runs*
Rating: PG/PG-13
Summary: A collection of journal entries from the boys of DBSK. Let's get inside their heads. ^.~
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Changmin's Diary~
Dear Diary,
Pardon my French...but WHAT THE FRENCH FRY!???!?!??!?
I was KIDNAPPED!!!!!
Right now I'm sitting on a plane with a bunch of foreigners I don't know except for the one guy beside me, whom I completely know and is totally not a foreigner but this is...and he is...and we....WHAT??!!
Okay, it all started when I was eating a sandwich.
It wasn't a very good sandwich. Yoochun made it. But he abandoned it all alone on the kitchen table and Yunho won't spend money on grocery shopping any more, so I've had to scavenge.
So I was eating Yoochun's sandwich when suddenly--all went black.
Well, blacker than usual. Our apartment has no lights since Yunho hasn't paid the light bill. What's up with that????
Someone had thrown a bag over my head and then there were arms everywhere trying to get my whole body inside the bag.
Crazy, right, Diary?!
I'm just glad I'm still alive.
In most situations, nothing good can come from having a bag thrown over your head and then having your body carried against it's will into what sounds and feels and smells like a car.
Yoochun must have been driving. He's a CRAP driver and a speed demon. Not a pleasant combination. And of course, who would think of putting a hostage in seat belts?? Who?? Certainly not Yoochun. So, my constrained body was thrown all over the backseat of the car for the whole ride.
With this clue alone, I blame all my misfortunes today on Park Yoochun.
I was sure I had a concussion and bruises on every surface of my body when the car stopped. (I'm fine now but at the time it FELT like a million bruises and an aneurism and possible internal bleeding....)
My captors dragged me across what felt like a really big parking lot. Because my head spent A LOT of time feeling every single ragged bump on the ground. They must have thought they had my head in their arms and was dragging me semi-safely, but NOPE. They had me by my feet and my HEAD was the one being dragged on the ground.
I knew they had taken me inside somewhere when the ground suddenly became much smoother like a tile floor and I heard voices echoing all around.
I know I have to blame Yunho for this, too, because I'm positive it was his voice I heard saying:
"Is he too late for his flight?"
I think whoever he was talking to was very, very surprised that Yunho was referring to the bag I was in, because I heard some professional-sounding lady stutter a lot and then call security.
I knew I heard the security guards rush in when my head sensed the pounding of many, many feet running on the ground. And then I could've SWORN there was a kung fu battle going on outside my bag.
I think one of them punched Yoochun in the mouth.
Heh heh...
Then I think it was Jaejoong that explained to them in that syrupy smooth voice of his that would make you trust him even if he told you that knives were TOTALLY not dangerous, that the bag that TOTALLY looked like storage for a dead body or a whole buffet of weapons was just their friend receiving a present from his bestest hyungs.
Bestest hyungs.... Pfft.
Then the security guards laughed, pat my bag congenially, wished me good luck and walked away.
And then I was hurled onto a conveyor belt with what felt like lots of other luggage...and I was transported to the plane like a frigging duffle bag.
The last voice I heard was Junsu's:
"HAVE FUN BANGING! EU KYANG KYANG KYANG KYANG!"
I have no idea what this is supposed to mean.
Someone found me and had to unzip me, gave me a ticket and told me to go find my seat for HUMANS on the plane.
But...I still didn't know WHY I need a plane in the first place. What's going on??
So, I found my seat. It was way back in coach. And I was still confused.
And then I saw him.
A friend.
Someone who looked just as confused as me.
Someone who's seat was apparently right next to mine.
Someone who's going to the exact same place I'm going. Wherever the crap that is.
Kibum smiled and I relaxed a little.
He said he wasn't sure why but yesterday he received a letter from my hyungs offering him an all expense paid overseas vacation. Of course he was skeptical, but then he showed me the note that came with the tickets and the money in the envelope. And at the bottom of the note, a message was scribbled in what I could only recognize as Junsu's crappy handwriting. It said something like:
'Don't freak out because we're suddenly offering you this. There are absolutely no strings attached. Well, no strings attached to the vacation. There better be some good strings attached to any LOVE connections you make on your trip. Okay? ALRIGHT?? Good. <3 Don't pay us back. Just take this as your birthday present for Yoochun. This is exactly what he wanted. Yay Yoochun's birthday! --Love Junsu, Jaejoong, Yunho, Yoochun and Junsu, Your Mysterious Hyung Benefactors'
Kibum said the way he'd gotten the letter was...pretty bizarre.
Yesung had apparently dressed up like a mailbox in front of his and Ryeowook and Kyuhyun's house just waiting for me to pass by so he could brutally maul me. And then Jaejoong passed by and shoved a letter deep inside of him.
Deep inside of him.....
I'm still not quite sure what this entails...
Then Yesung followed Jaejoong, I guess because the closer he can get to my hyungs, the closer he can get to killing me. But then Jaejoong passed our apartment and went on to Kibum, Heechul and Hankyung's place to borrow some rice because Yunho is being too stingy to buy food.
I bet Jaejoong spent a lot of time just hanging out and talking there and of course no one would want to invite a walking mailbox inside their house, so Yesung just waited outside.
That's when Kibum went out to check the mail. He said he thought it was weird that there were two mailboxes outside his house but he didn't question it and just checked them both. He saw a letter inside Yesung labeled 'To Our Special Dongsaeng, Kim' He opened it and found the message and the plane ticket and a debit card with a PIN number written on a slip of paper.
The only other Kim in Kibum's household is Heechul and he's not a dongsaeng to Jaejoong or the others. So, of course, it was meant for Kibum. Kibum figured Jaejoong must have wanted to give it to him but was too manly to give him such an awesome gift in person so he just shoved it in the mailbox and waited for him to receive it.
Personally, I don't know about the whole 'Jaejoong being too manly' part but whatever. It's Kibum's story.
And then the mailbox came to life.
And then Yesung complained to Kibum about his difficult travels as a mailbox and invited himself in to enjoy whatever was in Hankyung's fridge.
And then Kibum went to bed.
And then Kibum woke up early to pack and catch this plane.
And now we're sitting here.
Did this really just happen??
Then why couldn't my own roommates give me such a nice surprise by TELLING me rather than KIDNAPPING me?
I blame Yoochun.
Hmmmm...I wonder if they packed my luggage for me. Is it on the plane right now? I'd forgive Yoochun for about five minutes if they did.
Oh well. Guess I'm going on vacation.
...As a birthday present for Yoochun...
...Who isn't even on this plane with us...
...Whose birthday isn't until two months...
...
Something very weird is going on.
~Suspicious Min
Last page~
----------------------
I didn't even intend for it to happen but Changmin's entries are the first and last chapters of this whole series. x'D
Despite my very, very, very, very, very, very LOOOOONG hiatus with this fic, it was SO much fun writing it. :'D What made it even better was all the dedicated readers that followed it all the way through. <3333 Thanks SO much, you guys. You have no idea how much your support helped this fic exist. ^_^ And I know I said this fic would never end but...my muse needs to rest. x'D Thanks again, you guys! *blows kisses and gives you all hug!cookies*
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Author: k_chan91
Disclaimer: ....Yep....it's disclaimed...xD
Parts: [69/69] (Awkward number, I know x'D)
Pairings: So far Yoosu...Yunjae...Jaemin...Jaesu...Jaechun...Jaechul...xDDD
Genre: crack....with a tiny smidgeon of angst in the middle. o.o *runs*
Rating: PG/PG-13
Summary: A collection of journal entries from the boys of DBSK. Let's get inside their heads. ^.~
1 || 2 || 3 || 4 || 5 || 6 || 7 || 8 || 9 || 10 ||
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Changmin's Diary~
Dear Diary,
Pardon my French...but WHAT THE FRENCH FRY!???!?!??!?
I was KIDNAPPED!!!!!
Right now I'm sitting on a plane with a bunch of foreigners I don't know except for the one guy beside me, whom I completely know and is totally not a foreigner but this is...and he is...and we....WHAT??!!
Okay, it all started when I was eating a sandwich.
It wasn't a very good sandwich. Yoochun made it. But he abandoned it all alone on the kitchen table and Yunho won't spend money on grocery shopping any more, so I've had to scavenge.
So I was eating Yoochun's sandwich when suddenly--all went black.
Well, blacker than usual. Our apartment has no lights since Yunho hasn't paid the light bill. What's up with that????
Someone had thrown a bag over my head and then there were arms everywhere trying to get my whole body inside the bag.
Crazy, right, Diary?!
I'm just glad I'm still alive.
In most situations, nothing good can come from having a bag thrown over your head and then having your body carried against it's will into what sounds and feels and smells like a car.
Yoochun must have been driving. He's a CRAP driver and a speed demon. Not a pleasant combination. And of course, who would think of putting a hostage in seat belts?? Who?? Certainly not Yoochun. So, my constrained body was thrown all over the backseat of the car for the whole ride.
With this clue alone, I blame all my misfortunes today on Park Yoochun.
I was sure I had a concussion and bruises on every surface of my body when the car stopped. (I'm fine now but at the time it FELT like a million bruises and an aneurism and possible internal bleeding....)
My captors dragged me across what felt like a really big parking lot. Because my head spent A LOT of time feeling every single ragged bump on the ground. They must have thought they had my head in their arms and was dragging me semi-safely, but NOPE. They had me by my feet and my HEAD was the one being dragged on the ground.
I knew they had taken me inside somewhere when the ground suddenly became much smoother like a tile floor and I heard voices echoing all around.
I know I have to blame Yunho for this, too, because I'm positive it was his voice I heard saying:
"Is he too late for his flight?"
I think whoever he was talking to was very, very surprised that Yunho was referring to the bag I was in, because I heard some professional-sounding lady stutter a lot and then call security.
I knew I heard the security guards rush in when my head sensed the pounding of many, many feet running on the ground. And then I could've SWORN there was a kung fu battle going on outside my bag.
I think one of them punched Yoochun in the mouth.
Heh heh...
Then I think it was Jaejoong that explained to them in that syrupy smooth voice of his that would make you trust him even if he told you that knives were TOTALLY not dangerous, that the bag that TOTALLY looked like storage for a dead body or a whole buffet of weapons was just their friend receiving a present from his bestest hyungs.
Bestest hyungs.... Pfft.
Then the security guards laughed, pat my bag congenially, wished me good luck and walked away.
And then I was hurled onto a conveyor belt with what felt like lots of other luggage...and I was transported to the plane like a frigging duffle bag.
The last voice I heard was Junsu's:
"HAVE FUN BANGING! EU KYANG KYANG KYANG KYANG!"
I have no idea what this is supposed to mean.
Someone found me and had to unzip me, gave me a ticket and told me to go find my seat for HUMANS on the plane.
But...I still didn't know WHY I need a plane in the first place. What's going on??
So, I found my seat. It was way back in coach. And I was still confused.
And then I saw him.
A friend.
Someone who looked just as confused as me.
Someone who's seat was apparently right next to mine.
Someone who's going to the exact same place I'm going. Wherever the crap that is.
Kibum smiled and I relaxed a little.
He said he wasn't sure why but yesterday he received a letter from my hyungs offering him an all expense paid overseas vacation. Of course he was skeptical, but then he showed me the note that came with the tickets and the money in the envelope. And at the bottom of the note, a message was scribbled in what I could only recognize as Junsu's crappy handwriting. It said something like:
'Don't freak out because we're suddenly offering you this. There are absolutely no strings attached. Well, no strings attached to the vacation. There better be some good strings attached to any LOVE connections you make on your trip. Okay? ALRIGHT?? Good. <3 Don't pay us back. Just take this as your birthday present for Yoochun. This is exactly what he wanted. Yay Yoochun's birthday! --Love Junsu, Jaejoong, Yunho, Yoochun and Junsu, Your Mysterious Hyung Benefactors'
Kibum said the way he'd gotten the letter was...pretty bizarre.
Yesung had apparently dressed up like a mailbox in front of his and Ryeowook and Kyuhyun's house just waiting for me to pass by so he could brutally maul me. And then Jaejoong passed by and shoved a letter deep inside of him.
Deep inside of him.....
I'm still not quite sure what this entails...
Then Yesung followed Jaejoong, I guess because the closer he can get to my hyungs, the closer he can get to killing me. But then Jaejoong passed our apartment and went on to Kibum, Heechul and Hankyung's place to borrow some rice because Yunho is being too stingy to buy food.
I bet Jaejoong spent a lot of time just hanging out and talking there and of course no one would want to invite a walking mailbox inside their house, so Yesung just waited outside.
That's when Kibum went out to check the mail. He said he thought it was weird that there were two mailboxes outside his house but he didn't question it and just checked them both. He saw a letter inside Yesung labeled 'To Our Special Dongsaeng, Kim' He opened it and found the message and the plane ticket and a debit card with a PIN number written on a slip of paper.
The only other Kim in Kibum's household is Heechul and he's not a dongsaeng to Jaejoong or the others. So, of course, it was meant for Kibum. Kibum figured Jaejoong must have wanted to give it to him but was too manly to give him such an awesome gift in person so he just shoved it in the mailbox and waited for him to receive it.
Personally, I don't know about the whole 'Jaejoong being too manly' part but whatever. It's Kibum's story.
And then the mailbox came to life.
And then Yesung complained to Kibum about his difficult travels as a mailbox and invited himself in to enjoy whatever was in Hankyung's fridge.
And then Kibum went to bed.
And then Kibum woke up early to pack and catch this plane.
And now we're sitting here.
Did this really just happen??
Then why couldn't my own roommates give me such a nice surprise by TELLING me rather than KIDNAPPING me?
I blame Yoochun.
Hmmmm...I wonder if they packed my luggage for me. Is it on the plane right now? I'd forgive Yoochun for about five minutes if they did.
Oh well. Guess I'm going on vacation.
...As a birthday present for Yoochun...
...Who isn't even on this plane with us...
...Whose birthday isn't until two months...
...
Something very weird is going on.
~Suspicious Min
Last page~
----------------------
I didn't even intend for it to happen but Changmin's entries are the first and last chapters of this whole series. x'D
Despite my very, very, very, very, very, very LOOOOONG hiatus with this fic, it was SO much fun writing it. :'D What made it even better was all the dedicated readers that followed it all the way through. <3333 Thanks SO much, you guys. You have no idea how much your support helped this fic exist. ^_^ And I know I said this fic would never end but...my muse needs to rest. x'D Thanks again, you guys! *blows kisses and gives you all hug!cookies*
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